Saturday, September 13, 2008

I am a disturbed individual...

(I must preface this by saying I'm not speaking about any one person or any one group of people, or any one situation in my or anyone's life. If you choose to look past this statement, then so be it.)

I am a disturbed individual...

I'm disturbed by a lot of things...a lot of things in my life that are directly a part of my life, and a lot of things in my life that I actually have no control over.

I'm disturbed by the so many people who think they can't make a difference in this world, or that their existence in this world won't make any sort of difference in the world.

I'm disturbed by the apathy and the pessimism that has seemed to take over our country alone - that we have to accept the world as is - and convince ourselves that it is ok.

I'm disturbed by the inequity and inequality that seems to run rampant in our world.

I'm disturbed by the apathy which thrives on individualism and the idea that we should only do those things which benefit "me, me me."

I'm disturbed by the fact that people can't even have a discussion about the future of our country, about the policies which will govern our great nation, without it turning into an argument because we are all so hell-bent (on every side) that we are right.

I'm disturbed by how much gasoline and our consumption of it seems to run and determine our every moment of our very lives.

I'm disturbed by how much I personally partake in the "society" which I hope to change, while I also struggle to resist.

I'm disturbed by the absence of truth and honesty.

I'm disturbed by how little we seem to value education and wisdom.

I'm disturbed by how difficult it is to be yourself...myself...some days.

I'm disturbed by how little we value a good hard days work of honest work.

I'm disturbed by how easy it is to judge someone based on appearance - and how hard it can be to truly get to know anyone lately.

I'm disturbed by how easy it is to blame others and to not take credit for making a bad decision.

I'm disturbed by the lack of integrity and prudence in some people.

I'm disturbed by the apparent inability to eat locally and organically without spending a fortune to do so.

I'm disturbed by the lack of appreciation for history, the past, and patina...that progress seems to have to be about the bigger, newer and more expensive.

I'm disturbed at how hard it is to be vulnerable and how much you get beat up for doing so sometimes.

I'm disturbed at how it seems like its hard to enjoy life without being a obsessed with consumption.

I'm disturbed by a lot things that I can't help... by the fact that I can't seem to change them for the better...

I'm disturbed by violence.

I'm disturbed by how much passion can serve the good - but how dangerous it can be at the same time...

I'm disturbed by senseless loss of life.

I am disturbed by the saying "hate the sin, not the sinner."

I am disturbed by intolerance.

I'm disturbed by the fact that some people will read this and think it's terribly depressing, when it fact I mean for it to show concern and compassion for the ills of God's creation... that I am constantly thinking about how I am called to make all of God's creation, nature, people, society, animals, all of it... a better place, for the way God intended us to live...that I am concerned with it, anxious about it and worried about it... but that I also have hope, that I am optimistic and probably naive to a fault... but that I hope for the best and have faith that the best will eventually happen....

Monday, September 08, 2008

Great News!

I have offically been approved for ordination! This is contigent on the completion of my final semester of seminary (in 95 days) but I'm confident I will finish - so I'm not too worried :) Stay tuned for more info on the big celebration in Kansas City!